Sunday, June 23, 2013

Learning ventriloquism

I'm thinking of taking up ventriloquism as a hobby.  I never intended to do this, but I learned the perks of this recently.

Left Brain was golfing and had the car, so I took my trusty little scooter, Harley Worth-It, into town to meet with some friends for lunch.

With all the rain we've had lately there is a plethora of insect life at the campground.  Our helmet does not have a face guard and it's amazing even at only 25 mph how much those bugs can hurt when they smack into your face.  It's even worse at higher speeds.

But the pain of impact is only one part of it.  I'm starting to understand why bikers in general don't smile much.  I thought it was just part of the tough biker image.  But while zipping along on an electric blue scooter, it's really hard to look tough.

You need to understand that I love to talk to myself.  I talk to the cats, to Left Brain, to anyone that will listen.  But some of my favorite conversations are with myself.  Maybe it's because I win most of my arguments.  Not all of them, but most.

I also love to sing and especially while driving.  So here I am, chatting away to the birds, turtles and whatever while on the scooter when a bug of some unknown species smacked me in the mouth.  And I mean IN the mouth.  I was so shocked that I swallowed before I knew what happened.

Thankfully there was no bite or sting, so there wasn't any pain involved; just the unpleasant image of some large insect going through my digestive tract.

You might think this would be enough to shut me up, but I don't stiffle myself that easily.  So I continued my chatter and singing, but with lips closed.  I don't know how much my lips moved or what it looked like, but it sounded pretty good to me...and probably to the huge honking bug crawling down my throat on his way to my stomach.

If this develops further, I may have return to my dollmaking and fashion up some kind of dummy to work with. 

Long Live the Queen of Dummies


  1. There is definately an advantage to talking with your mouth closed, especially when riding on a ... scooter? Hay, you are a brave soul, running around on a scooter by yourself and then opening up to the opportunistic bug world ... UGH! Interestingly, I was just thinking about the advantages of talking with my mouth closed. After all the ease dropping talk in the news, I was thinking how easy it would be for a mouth reader to be able to tell what we were saying to each other at a distance ... more privacy intrusion. So, we could all just start talking with our mouth closed and nobody would have a clue what we were talking about ... like I could say anything that would be controversial ... Ha! Anyway, I was on my way to bed and now you have my brain buzzing ... like buggy buzzing. Yuk, way to go Queen of bad dreams ...

    Andrea @ From The Sol

  2. Do you suppose you'll recognize that bug when he comes out with everything else? Oh yuk yuk!! There was a young lady on America's Got Talent that did this. She had two puppets and was absolutely fabulous!! I guess if you can ride around eating bugs on a scooter, then you should be great at this too. lol. Have a great night. Hugs, Edna B.

  3. p.s. I like your robin and that cheesecake too!!

  4. I love Lamb Chop. If you do something like that, let me know!